Shoveling the coals

Y'all, something happened recently that rocked my world. It totally felt like a sucker punch to the gut and then a kick while I was down. It left me stunned, broken and depleted. Then, I pretended like nothing happened for the rest of the day, which led to pure exhaustion the next day.

I'm not here to give you details about the event. It's not important. The important thing is how it effected me and what I'm doing about it. My brain has felt blocked since then. I haven't been able to think clearly. Whenever I try to write something my creativity seems to be inaccessible (and, lets face it... I don't have a large well to draw from anyway!).

So here I am. Writing anyway. Mostly because I promised myself that I was going to make an effort to keep up this blog. And I gotta be honest, just writing about this is exhausting me. But, I have a million things I need to do and if I don't get this feeling out of my head I will continue to move at a snails pace. Getting this out of my head here will look different than on a more private platform. But I am going for a 2-for-1 deal here because, like I said... I promised myself to keep up this blog.

When I have clients write to empty their heads, I tell them it doesn't have to make sense or even be complete thoughts. But jotting things down is like digging the hot coals out of the fireplace to keep the house from burning down. So here is my word dump:

fire eyes

quiet

unnecessary rage

wtf did I do?

poison darts

target alone.

alone?

pulse pounding

seriously, again?

manifested

how is this still going on?

breathe

ignorance?

flaming daggers

exhaustion